I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I think my vagina is haunted
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
