So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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