Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
No subtext here. People are naked.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Randomize
