I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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