Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
