Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
