9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
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