i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
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