When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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