I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
