HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize