Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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