clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
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