Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Randomize