haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Randomize
