Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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