Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Randomize
