I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Randomize
