every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
worst night to have a conscience
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
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