so explain again why im purple
no
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
