You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
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