It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
