Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Randomize
