she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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