he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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