Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Randomize
