So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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