He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
