wrigley field is MILF paradise
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I got inside last night via doggy door
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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