Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
