She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize