You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
