i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Randomize
