is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Randomize
