The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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