Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Randomize
