I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize