I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
