pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
one might say we're banned from that church
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
