he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
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