I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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