I can feel you judging me through the phone.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
