Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
