that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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