i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Randomize
