Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
he puts the penis in happiness.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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