I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Randomize
