There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Randomize
