Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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