i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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