Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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